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Chapter 19

Lance hadn’t had a chance to go over their whole section for the paper before Chris printed it. He’d given Christina her half and he’d taken his half and together, they’d come up with their submission. Except for a few messages that couldn’t be printed due to content, every one had been used, as they figured that if people were going to be paying them money, they should at least be printed, no matter how silly they were.

It had taken nearly no time for the handful of people to distribute the papers. And as much as everyone had wanted to go out for ice cream afterwards, everyone had to get home to work on homework that seemed to be continuously piling up. That was why on Friday morning, Lance hadn’t been prepared for the shock of his life.

Nick was at his locker first, which was a very rare occasion. They’d spent a bit of time the night before while stuffing lockers, discussing Joey’s suggestion and when it came down to it, Christina and Lance both admitted that it was something that Nick was going to have to decide on his own. They wouldn’t be able to help him, as it was a lot of time that he’d be giving up, and they didn’t want to influence his decision either way. Nick had gone home and talked it over with his mother, surprised when she said he was old enough to make his own mind up about it. He had assumed she would instantly nix the idea and tell him that it would be too time consuming and therefore, would not be allowed to participate. Her giving him the power to decide on his own only added another wrench to the mix.

It was all he’d been able to think about the whole night and Nick knew that by third period, he was going to have to give Mrs. Edwards a decision. He did want to discuss it with her first for a few minutes before giving his answer, just in case Joey had been mistaken on anything. Nick needed to be sure that what he’d been told was in fact right, so he didn’t make a mistake and commit to something he wouldn’t be able to follow through on.

"Have you read it yet?" Lance asked as he pulled his copy of the Report out of his locker. Nick smiled and shook his head.

"Nah, waited for you to get here. Are you excited?" Nick knew how surprised Lance had been when Chris not only told him that his idea was a great idea, but that they were going to put it in the next issue of the Report, which had only given him a week to assemble. Of course, with Christina’s help it hadn’t been nearly as hard at it might have been, but it was still exciting for Lance to have his own section of the paper.

Just as they were about to open their papers to the back where the personals had been placed, Britney and Christina came running down the hall towards them. "NO!" Christina gave a strangled yelp which caused for Lance and Nick to burst into laughter. The girls were out of breath as they leaned against their lockers.

"What?" Nick laughed.

"We wanted to have us all do it together," Britney breathed. "Give us a second."

The girls stashed their bags away and readjusted themselves, and finally they were ready. "Okay, now lets read." Christina nodded, winking at Nick and Lance who couldn't help but laugh at them.

"Finally!" Nick opened the paper and quickly scanned the countless messages. He’d put a few of his own in there, so he first looked for those to make sure that they sounded okay.

He found the one nearly immediately as Lance must have put it at the top on purpose.

TO: The Peroxide Twins
FROM: Your Locker Buddies
             -It’s been great to finally meet the *REAL* you! You girls
              are awesome! Next time, movies are on you! :)

Britney and Christina both giggled as they playfully punched their ‘locker buddies’. "You guys are horrible!" Britney pouted.

Nick and Lance only grinned and nodded.

His own name caught Nick’s eye and he was surprised to find that someone had sent HIM a message.

TO: Nick Carter
FROM: A Secret Admirer
            -You’re an awesome basketball player. Really cute too. Do you
              have a girlfriend? Do you want one?

Nick blushed and showed it to both Christina and Lance. "Who sent me this one?"

Lance read it and laughed. "I have no idea. We had them fold up their little pieces of paper so we couldn’t read it. Some wanted privacy so we promised that we wouldn’t look. That’s awesome though."

Nick stuck out his tongue. "Umm, no, I don’t have a girlfriend. And I don’t want one!"

Britney stuck her tongue out at him. "Nothing wrong with girlfriends."

Nick turned to Christina and gave her an inquiring smile. "Was this you?" She blushed and shook her head in response.

"Um. No. I already told you I liked you, I know what ‘I like boys’ means thank you very much."

Nick continued reading as he found one that he knew was from Christina.

TO: My Frog Prince
FROM: The Scream Queen
               -You’re a fun date. Next time I’ll buy the ticket and you can get
                the snacks. Thanks for everything, from science talks (and
                you doing the gross stuff in class) to heart to hearts you’ve
                really been a sweetie. Xoxo

Nick blushed and saw Christina’s face was still a light shade of pink. He pulled her close and hugged her tightly. "Thanks to you too," Nick whispered against the side of her head. He never would have expected for them to become friends at all, let alone get as close as they had over the past few weeks. The thing about Christina was that she was a great listener. She didn’t judge Nick, she listened to everything he said and was able to provide unbiased advice for him, never once making him feel stupid for how he was feeling. They had talked about everything from Justin, to Kevin and pretty much anything in between. He’d confided in her things that he hadn’t told anyone, even Lance or AJ and they pretty much knew everything about him.

"I’m really glad that we’re friends Nick," Christina admitted shyly. There were times that she still felt her pulse race at the sight of Nick, or even when they were sitting next to each other and she got a startling realization that he was there with her and less than a foot away, but for the majority of the time, she’d been able to move past the impossible crush she had on him to become his friend. They had done their fair share of venting and crying to one another, and it was him that ultimately helped her realize that it didn’t matter what people were saying about her in school, it was how she felt about herself and what her friends thought that was important.

Just before Justin had coaxed Britney into switching seats with Nick for science, Christina had been contemplating transferring to another school and starting new. Again. She hated how the boys were always hanging around their lockers, thinking that she and Britney were as easy as they made everyone think they were for the first two months of school. But it was the way Nick looked at her and treated her normally that made her put her decision to transfer on hold. And now, although people still said things about her as she walked down the hall, and girls gave her mean looks while guys made obscene gestures towards her, it didn’t bother her as much, because she knew that no matter what, she’d made friends that would stick behind her and that was all she needed at Lincoln High.

"Me too." Nick scanned the Lost and Founds for a moment. He felt his pulse race as he noticed one item under Lost in particular.

LOST: One best friend. I miss him dearly and would like him back. I don’t know where or why I lost him, but it hurts knowing he’s gone.

His hand was trembling and he fought not to call attention to it. Another message caught his eye.

TO: Fresh Meat
FROM: Varsity Boys Basketball
              -You’ve got great skills in practice dude. Don’t worry, you’ll
               get more court time soon!

Before he could think more about that, another one caught Nick’s eye, causing for him to gasp and grin broadly.

TO: LB
FROM: AM
            -U+ME=FUN! I like you much more than the numbers we’ve
            been crunching. Maybe sometime we can ditch the math and
            work on chemistry or biology. I’ve always thought science was fun.

Nick looked up to see if Lance had noticed. If he had, he showed no outward signs of it. "Uhh, Lance?" Nick asked nervously. His eye met Christina’s and she had as confused a smile on her face as Nick did. She shook the paper as if asking if that’s what he was about to bring up and Nick nodded. Christina simply shrugged and held back a giggle.

"Yeah Nick?" Lance tore his eyes from the Lost ads, wondering if one in particular had been written by either Nick or Justin. Both of them had bought ad space and it sounded suspiciously as if one of them was asking the other for a truce, able to anonymously reveal how they really felt about the situation.

"Have you read all the messages?"

"Not all of them, some are just stupid." Lance shrugged as he went back to reading. "Chris went through them all, just to make sure none were vulgar or had curse words."

"Did you see the one for you?"

Lance gave a distracted nod. Chris had included a message for him which had made him laugh. It was just an inside joke about how Lance was trying to steal his job from under him and how Chris would always be his superior. For Nick to make a comment about it was surprising though. "Yeah, I got Chris’. He thinks he’s much funnier than he is sometimes."

Nick exchanged a look with Christina. They both rolled their eyes. "No, not that one."

Lance looked up and at them. "What do you mean? Which one?" Both of his friends were looking at him oddly and Lance felt butterflies in his stomach. When Nick pointed out the one he should read, his eyes nearly bugged out of his head. He had to read it a few times just to make sure he was reading it right. Lance felt lightheaded and giddy. He also felt a brief surge of panic. He had no idea what to do.

"Well?" Christina asked. "It’s so obvious that you both like each other." When Lance paled she paused. "You do like him right? I haven’t been hallucinating?"

There was too much going on around Lance at once and he didn’t know what to do or say. As often as he thought he’d imagined that AJ was interested in him, he had never expected him to come right out and say it. And second, at no point had he thought that either of them had been obvious enough about their feelings for people to have noticed. Lance looked at Christina with fear in his eyes and he watched her face soften.

"Ooh, Lance." She cooed. "It’s okay sweetie."

"But ...how did you know?" He looked at Nick who held his hands up in defense.

"It’s just ...you two are always so into each other. And it’s so obvious that you like each other but are too afraid to say anything."

"He’s definitely said something here," Britney whistled as she read the message. "You’re gonna tell him you want him too, right?"

Lance didn’t know what he wanted to do. Well, besides having the floor open up and swallow him whole. He was mortified that everyone knew he liked AJ and that they were talking so casually about it like it was no big deal. But as he thought about AJ, his smile, his voice, the way he looked in a pair of ripped jeans and a vintage tee shirt, a smile covered his face and Lance felt butterflies in his stomach. Christina’s voice interrupted his daydream.

"See that look on your face?" She held a mirror up for him to see what she was talking about. Lance nodded. "That’s how he gets when he’s looking at you."

"Or thinking of you," Britney agreed.

"What should I do?" Lance asked in defeat. He had never experienced this before and didn’t know what to do.

"Talk to him," Nick suggested softly. Neither of you will know how the other is really feeling if you don’t talk to him.

Lance looked his best friend in the eye. "Like you and Justin?"

Nick’s facial expression hardened. "I don’t want to talk about it."

~~~~~

Justin had been on his way down to Nick and Lance’s locker. He was at school early that morning for practice and thus had received his copy of the Report. He’d been curious as to how Lance’s new section would look and so he sat down in front of his locker, and read each message. The one from his team mates had made him smile and feel a little better about practices and games. Knowing that they recognized his effort made being benched almost worth it. There had been a few messages that he’d found funny, but one particular one caught his eye. Under LOST, and he had a sneaking suspicion that it was directed towards him. The sadness that was evident in the ad made Justin think hard about the past few weeks and he realized that whatever issues he was having, would only worsen if he didn’t at least try to talk to Nick about them.

He had been walking down the hall and just about to turn the corner when one of the sophomore boys who had tried out for Varsity along side him approached. "Hey Timberlake!"

Justin turned, and offered a polite smile. "Hi."

"So they cut me from the team, to make a spot on the bench for YOU?" Justin had been taken back by the anger in the boys’ voice and so hadn’t been prepared with any response. "I think it’s shitty that I can’t play because you are on the team, but you’re not doing anything but wasting space and a jersey."

Before Justin could respond, someone else did. Justin turned around to see Brian Littrell standing behind him, his face red with anger. "Excuse me, but you have no clue as to what the hell you’re talking about."

"Don’t I? Why’s he on the team? To keep the bench warm for when you need to take a break?"

Justin felt sick to his stomach. Everything he’d been thinking since making the team was being voiced, which only made Justin feel that if HE was thinking it, everyone else probably was too.

"So answer me this," Brian said coolly. "What does it say about YOU, if we’d rather have a freshman kid sit on the bench and do nothing than have you on the team playing?"

Justin watched as the sophomore’s face contorted to that of anger. Just as he was about to say something to respond to Brian’s insult Kevin stepped in. "Look Matthews, you didn’t make the team. Again! Don’t take it out on the kid because you’ve got no game and he does. It’s not his fault you just can’t take a clue."

"You think you’re all such hot shit, playing on the Varsity teams," Matthews said angrily. "Well you’re not. You’re nothing. Varsity means nothing."

Brian let out an airy laugh and rolled his eyes. "If Varsity means nothing and you don't want to be like us, then why the hell are you harassing Justin for making the team when you didn’t?"

Justin held his breath until the sophomore turned on his heel and stormed away. The sickly churning hadn’t gone away and Justin felt exhausted. Brian placed a hand on his shoulder and smiled comfortingly at him. "Forget him, Justin. He’s just bitter."

"He’s bitter because he’s right!" Justin sighed in defeat. "I shouldn’t have tried out. If I had have just gone out for the freshman team, I’d at least get to play. Right now I’m just taking up space." Before Brian could argue, Justin gave a sad shrug of his shoulders and headed in the opposite direction. The last thing he needed was to go and see Nick now, and have to witness how happy and perfect his life was when Justin’s kept getting worse.

The silence at Nick and Lance’s locker was deafening and no one knew what to say to comfort Nick. He hadn’t meant for his tone to be so biting, but at the same time was sick of everyone trying to stick their noses into his business. The last thing he wanted was to constantly be reminded that his best friend since kindergarten, the one person who he’d been able to always count on, hated him. It wasn’t even that Justin was mad at Nick, it was beyond that now and Nick was starting to believe that they would never speak again, which hurt him more than he could possibly let on.

It was Joey’s appearance at Nick’s locker that broke the silence. "Hey, Fresh Meat."

There was still some residual frustration lingering in Nick’s psyche and so he turned to Joey and snarled, "my name is Nick."

Lance’s jaw dropped and Britney and Christina had to stifle their laughter at the look of surprise on Joey’s face. Nick had been so focused on his anger that he hadn’t realized that right behind Joey stood Brian and Kevin, all watching him with extreme interest.

"Nick," Joey said cautiously. It was obvious that the kid was having some sort of issues and he realized that if he was going to keep his head from being bitten off, he would have to tread lightly. "Sorry, I..."

Nick closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He counted to ten before opening them again and offering an apologetic smile. "No, I’m sorry. I’m having a bit of a rough month." It was then that he noticed Kevin standing there. He prepared himself for the somersaults that he knew were coming. When the butterflies were under considerable control, he focused once more on Joey. "What’s up?"

"Are all the freshmen moody this year or is it just me?" Joey asked Brian who shrugged and Kevin who yawned.

"Maybe it’s you," Kevin answered with a smirk. "They just don’t like you."

"Fuck off Richardson," Joey warned with a glare and a fake punch to the stomach. He turned back to Nick who was looking at him impatiently. "I was just wondering what you’d decided. About set design."

"I have a few things I need to talk to Mrs. Edwards about and then I’ll let you know," Nick promised. He had a feeling that he would be doing it, but didn’t want to say so just yet. Joey’s face fell as he had probably been expecting an instant yes. "You’ll know by third period this morning. Is that okay?"

"It’s gonna have to be," Joey said with a shrug. "Okay, I hope to see you then."

The three of them headed down the hall towards the Senior lounge, leaving the four freshmen to watch them. As they were about to turn the corner, Kevin looked back over his shoulder, directly at Nick. He paused for a moment, his gaze lingered and then as abruptly as he stopped, he continued walking and out of sight.

"Holy shit," Christina said softly. "Did you see that?"

After asking Nick if it would be okay, Christina had told Britney all about Nick and his crush on Kevin. Britney had been wondering why Nick and Christina had been spending so much time talking together and wanted to know if they were secretly dating. It was then that Christina felt the need to be honest with her and once Nick had given his permission, she filled her best friend in on everything that had been going on. Both girls promised to keep Nick’s private life private, and would not tell anyone until Nick himself said it was okay.

Nick was still in shock at the way Kevin had turned around and looked so intensely at him. His pulse was racing twice as fast now.

"He was totally looking at you," Britney agreed with a grin. She tapped Nick on the shoulder and waited until she had his attention. "Well Nicky, at least he knows your name now."

The whole group burst into laughter, including Nick whose face had gone a brilliant shade of red. "Oh my god, did you hear me snap at him. My name is NICK!"

"At first I thought you did it on purpose, but then I saw the look of surprise on your face when you noticed him there," Lance laughed. The warning bell rang and the four teens scrambled to get their books.

"I’m such a dork," Nick laughed. Once they’d said their good-byes, the girls headed off to home room while Nick and Lance did the same. "So, you’re gonna talk to him, right?"

Lance gave a nervous nod. "I think so."

"You think?"

Lance sighed. "I know so. Yes. I’m going to talk to him, but I don’t know what to say!"

"Just be honest with him. It’ll probably be just you two at lunch today right, I have a meeting with my guidance councilor over lunch so I won’t be joining you..."

At the mention of Nick meeting with his guidance councilor Lance became concerned. All thoughts of AJ was pushed to the back for a moment. "Is everything okay?"

Nick gave an embarrassed nod. "Yeah. I’ve just skipped too many history classes and they want to talk about my truancy or something. So I've got to meet with her so she can make sure that it’s just me being a normal teen and not bigger underlying social issues." Nick rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Whatever."

Lance breathed a sigh of relief. He knew that Nick’s constant skipping of last period was going to catch up with him, although he knew that since he was only in grade nine and could probably talk his way out of trouble, he was going to be fine. "Okay, good."

"Yeah, it’s okay. So you’re going to have Aje all to yourself today, so talk to him then. Or if you’d rather do it when it’s not as busy, with so many people around, ask him to go out or something tonight. So then it’s just the two of you and you’ll be able to really talk."

"I thought we were going to go to a movie or something tonight," Lance protested. He blushed when Nick gave him a knowing look. They were at Nick’s homeroom door and he paused before entering.

"We can go to a movie any time, this is so more important."

Lance’s stomach was tingling and he copied one of Nick’s shimmies. "You sure?"

"Duh! Now get to home room, I'll talk to you later."

End Chapter 19


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